She’s a journalist, radio presenter and ‘Big Brother’ alumnus. Now Vanessa Feltz has another string to her bow – grandmother. Recently crowned Table Table’s Celebrity Grandparent of the year, she reveals what being a grandmother means to her…
Q. Congratulations on being named Table Table’s Celebrity grandparent of the year!
A. Thank you, I’m chuffed to bits. I always hoped I was a good grandma but to have it made official is rather nifty. The other finalists were the Queen, Jeremy Corbyn, Caitlyn Jenner and Mary Berry – so it’s quite nice to slam dunk the Queen when it comes to grandparenthood!
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Q. And we hear congratulations are in order on the birth of your new grandchild, too…
A. Yes! I’ve just had a brand new grandbaby. So I’ve got a 22-month-old grandson called Ezekiel Jack and a four-week old granddaughter called Neroli Joy. It’s very exciting to have one of each. We were all blue [in the house] and now we’re all pink!
Q. Would you say you’re a hands-on grandparent?
A. I see Zeke every day. I’m a nappy-changer, bather and hair-washer. I’m in for the long-haul and I’m certainly not a ‘have them for fun and then hand them back’ kind of grandma. I’m all about the nitty gritty.
Q. Were you surprised by the strength of the bond you felt for your grandchildren?
A. Not at all surprised – it’s just as powerful as I expected it would be. It’s a deep, physical, sprung-from-my-own-body kind of connection and a feeling as profound as when you have your own children. I feel completely, umbilically connected to them.
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Q. Do you feel like a young grandparent?
A. I was about 50 when Zeke was born – so not particularly young. My mum was 46 when I made her a grandmother and legally you can be a grandmother from the age of 32. I felt more than ready. I felt like this is the time when I should be grandma-ing and I know all my friends who haven’t yet got grandchildren are wildly jealous. I don’t blame them because it’s the best thing ever.
Q. What’s the best thing about being a grandparent for you?
A. I just like having extra people to love. It’s having someone to kiss and cuddle and play all the games with that I used to play with my girls. It’s like travelling back in time and reliving how you felt as a new mother. Neroli is still very small, but Zeke and I really share a sense of humour – we have these long telephone conversations where he speaks to me in imaginary words. He phones me and says the word ‘plum’ and I just laugh.
Q. Have you noticed a shift in your relationship with your daughter, Allegra, since becoming a grandmother?
A. To watch your own child become a mother is an amazing thing. I’m bowled over by Allegra’s aptitude, kindness, compassion and strength and it’s a delight to watch her perform this vital job so incredibly well. It also makes me think that I must have done something right when I see her being such an amazing parent. I had to explain to her that the overwhelming love she feels for her babies is exactly how I felt – and still feel – about her. I’m the kind of parent who tells them I love them 20 times before breakfast!
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Q. Do you think the role of grandparents is something that’s overlooked in society?
A. It’s very important to highlight the role of grandparents. It’s easy to forget it, take it for granted or marginalise it. They play a crucial role in everybody’s lives – but particularly the lives of their adult children who usually need to work – and they’re an amazing source of childcare, support and understanding. It’s vital to acknowledge their role to the next generation and the generation coming.
Q. What would your advice be to other grandparents?
A. The only thing you can do is be the best grandparent you can be. The most loving, the most patient, the most encouraging and the most constructive. I like to see myself as a Fairy Godmother grandma, sprinkling a bit of fairy dust over everything they do, or a genie who will rub my lamp and grant a few wishes. I’m trying to add a layer of fun, love and excitement to their lives. They’re lives already full of love, but it’s just an extra layer, and I don’t think anybody can have too much.
Vanessa Feltz presented the award for 'Table Table's Grandparent of the Year 2015'. For more information on Table Table please visit TableTable.co.uk
