Whether you've been together for five months for 20 years, there's one thing that every relationship needs: laughter. A sense of humor can help ease tension after a petty fight or even help you to remember why you fell in love with them in the first place when times get tough.
With that in mind, funny anniversary quotes are one way to bring laughter back to your relationship whether you're looking to fill out a handwritten card or write a sappy Instagram caption about your significant other. Don't get us wrong, you can still be sweet and sincere in your message, but throwing in a funny one-liner can help lighten the mood and bring a smile to your partner's face.
Plus, these are even great to use on friends and family members posts for their anniversaries whether it's your parents' big 30th anniversary or a best friends five year anniversary.
Funny Anniversary One-Liners
- We go together like copy and paste — slightly annoying but inseparable and necessary.
- Another year means another reason to keep hiding the good snacks.
- Being married is mostly just shouting 'what?' from different rooms.
- Congratulations! We’ve successfully tolerated each other for another 365 days!
- Love you more than I love not sharing my fries — and that’s saying something.
- There's no one else in the world I'd rather have snoring next me.
- Forgot to cancel my 30-day marriage trial... Phew!
- Grateful that we both swiped right.
- After all this time, my love for you is still stronger than my WiFi signal.
- Sorry, no refunds. Happy anniversary!
- Today we celebrate the best decision you've ever made.
- You still give me the same feeling as when I see my food coming at a restaurant.
- A new year of love, humor, and putting up with the in-laws is here!
- My husband thinks I'm crazy, but I'm not the one who married me!
- I can't believe how much I'm not sick of you.
- May your love never run out like toilet paper.
Famous Funny Anniversary Quotes
- "My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me." – Winston Churchill
- "Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are." – Will Ferrell
- "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes." – Jim Carrey
- "Marriage is nature’s way of keeping people from fighting with strangers." – Alan King
- "My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way." – Henny Youngman
- "Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open." — George Bernard Shaw
- "Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell." — Joan Crawford
- "I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life." — Rita Rudner
- "A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband." — Michel De Montaigne
- "A marriage anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance, and tenacity. The order varies for any given year." — Paul Sweeney
- "An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her." — Agatha Christie
- "To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up." — Ogden Nash
- "As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy." — Ralphie May
Funny Quotes From Movies, TV Shows and Books
- “Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park.” — Friends
“Marriage is like a deck of cards… at the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.” — Family Guy - “When you love somebody, you go deaf, dumb, and blind.” — The Way We Were
- “They say marriage is about communication, but sometimes I wonder if you’re just talking to make sure I’m not near the TV.” — The Simpsons
- “Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill and not doing it because you’d miss them.” — How I Met Your Mother
- "Husbands are like wine; they take a long time to mature." — Letters to Juliet
- "When I was a kid, most of the advice that my dad gave me was crap. But there's one thing that he said that was pure genius...he said, if you're ever with a girl that's too good for you, marry her." — Valentine's Day
- "Marriage is like a tense, unfunny, version of Everybody Loves Raymond, only it doesn't last 22 minutes. It lasts forever." — Knocked Up
- "Even a pain in the ass needs someone to take care of them." — 28 Days
- "Well, that's what we do, we fight. You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of the bitch and I tell you when you're a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have, like, a two-second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing." — The Notebook
- "I think anybody who falls in love is a freak. It's a crazy thing to do. It's kind of like a form of socially acceptable insanity." — Her
- "Love is patient, love is kind, love means slowly losing your mind." — 27 Dresses
- "We both said I do, and we haven’t agreed on a single thing since." — So I Married an Ax Murderer
- "When you love somebody, you go deaf, dumb, and blind." — The Way We Were
Funny Anniversary Quotes for Your Husband
- Thank you for pretending to listen to my stories for another year. Love you.
- I’ve loved you since the day I realized you knew how to fix the Wi-Fi.
- You make marriage look easy — mainly by letting me win every argument. Happy anniversary!
- I could never replace you — unless I find someone who actually loads the dishwasher right. Happy anniversary honey!
- Happy anniversary! Here’s to love, laughter, and never agreeing on thermostat settings!
- They say behind every great man is a great woman. So, honey, on our anniversary, I just wanted to let you know I'm behind you…judging your every move.
- Happy anniversary to the guy who can fix anything around the house except his questionable fashion choices. You’re lucky you have me!
- Cheers to another year of pretending to know what I’m talking about and you actually listening. Happy anniversary, husband.
- Happy anniversary to the man who still thinks I’m hot, even when I’m in my sweatpants and no makeup. Love you!
- I’ll keep on loving you, even when you’re old and wrinkly.
- To my husband, on our anniversary: let’s continue to argue, tease each other, and make up with kisses. Love you!
- Happy anniversary to the man who still thinks I’m funny, even when no one else does.
- My favorite part of waking up to you in the morning…is when you’re handing me coffee. Happy anniversary!
- After all these years, I’ve learned that the key to a happy marriage is a remote control. And snacks. Lots of snacks.
- Happy anniversary to the man who makes every day feel like a romantic comedy, complete with laughter, drama, and the occasional plot twist!
- Marriage is a relationship where one person is always right, and the other is the husband—just kidding — happy anniversary!
Funny Anniversary Quotes for Your Wife
- You’re the reason I still believe in love and noise-canceling headphones. Happy anniversary!
- Happy anniversary! You're my favorite person to do nothing with — and also everything else.
- You complete me like coffee completes you before 9 a.m. Happy anniversary!
- You’re the reason I know the difference between mauve, blush, and dusty rose and I wouldn't change it for the world.
- You’re still the woman of my dreams… and the reason I’m losing sleep. Happy anniversary honey!
- I can't believe how lucky I am to have a wife who can tolerate all of my antics. Happy anniversary!
- I'm still not sure how I convinced you to marry me, but I'm glad I did. Happy anniversary.
- Happy anniversary, my love. I never knew being married meant I’d have someone to pick out my clothes each day, tell me how to wear my hair and give me driving instructions.
- It would be hard to picture a life without you. I mean who would pay the mortgage?
- Here’s to another year of marriage, where I still have no idea what I’m doing, but we’re doing it together. Happy anniversary!
- Marriage is all about compromise. I pretend to listen, and you pretend to talk. It works! Happy anniversary!
- On our anniversary, I want you to know how much I've enjoyed annoying you all this time and how excited I am to keep doing it in the future.
- Every day I fall in love with you more and more — except yesterday. Yesterday, you were pretty annoying.
Funny Anniversary Quotes for Couples
- Still together? Must be all that wine and selective hearing, don't you think?
- Cheers to staying married even after assembling IKEA furniture together! Ha!
- Marriage: where ‘romantic dinner’ means eating on the couch in sweatpants.
- You guys are like a romantic comedy… mostly comedy. Happy anniversary!
- Your love is like your laundry — sometimes a mess, but always there. Love ya!
- You two are a classic couple, like peanut butter and jelly, Batman and Robin and the TV remote and the couch cushion. Here's to many more years of perfect pairings!
- Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you're looking for a club and a spade.
- Well, you both made it another year without one of you ending up dead or in jail. I call that a win. Happy anniversary!
- Happy anniversary! Here’s to never again having a moment to yourself.
- I’m relieved that neither of you ghosted the other! Happy anniversary!
- Congratulations for defeating the odds in your marriage.
- Let’s commemorate the day you both decided to stop looking for someone better.
- This serves as a yearly reminder that you are still legally wed.
Funny Anniversary Quotes for Your Parents
- You’re the reason ‘happy couple’ and ‘crazy couple’ sometimes mean the same thing. Love you guys!
- You two are the ultimate team — like Batman and Robin, but with more snacks. Happy anniversary, parents!
- Your marriage is a masterclass in ‘How to Survive Life with Humor. Love you!
- Your marriage has survived everything — even family dinners. Happy anniversary!
- Happy anniversary! You’ve been together so long, even your arguments have arguments, LOL.
- You're proof marriage survives teenage tantrums and bad advice from yours truly. Happy anniversary, parents!
- Mom and Dad, you're not just an inspiration; you're a hilarious reality show. Keep the episodes coming!
- We hope you celebrate your special day in style, even if that style is pajamas, slippers, and an 8 pm bedtime. We love you!
- Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad! Thanks for proving that love (and a whole lot of patience) can truly last a lifetime.
- Happy anniversary to my favorite parents! Love, your favorite child.
- Happy anniversary! May your love story continue to be the envy of us single folks...until we find someone to tolerate our quirks too!
Funny Quotes for Milestone Years
- Congratulations! You’ve survived 25 years of asking, ‘Do I really have to put the toilet seat down?
- Congrats! You’re officially a decade in and still annoying each other daily. Happy anniversary!
- 40 years: enough time to perfect the ‘Yes dear’ and ‘I’m sorry’ techniques. Happy anniversary!
- Happy anniversary! Fifty years means you’re basically experts in love, patience, and ignoring weird habits.
- After 60 years, love is less about romance and more about ‘Don’t forget your meds. Happy anniversary!
- Congratulations on completing your yearlong trial. I’m hoping you decide to stay together.
- Happy anniversary! We made it a whole year without accidentally setting the house on fire. Here's to many more (hopefully fire-free) years!
- Happy 5th anniversary! Five years, 60 months, 260 weeks, or 1,825 days—however you count it, it all adds up to love.
- Happy 5th anniversary! High five! We've officially been married longer than most reality TV marriages last.
- A decade of love, laughter, and memories. Happy anniversary!
- Happy 10-year anniversary. In dog years, we'd probably both be dead by now!
- Double digits, baby! We must be doing something right...or at least tolerating each other exceptionally well.
- Twenty-five years ago, you began your journey together. Today, you celebrate a lifetime of love (and laughter)! Happy silver anniversary!
- Cheers to 40 years of marriage – or as I like to call it, the ultimate partnership in crime! May our love continue to be as timeless as our questionable fashion choices from the 80s.
- Happy 50th anniversary! We may argue over the thermostat setting more than ever, but hey, at least we still agree on who gets the last slice of pizza!
Annie O’Sullivan (she/her) covers holiday, gift guide, travel, and lifestyle content at Good Housekeeping. She has a degree in magazine journalism from Syracuse University and previously reported for Runner’s World, NBC New York/NY 4 and Woman’s Day. Annie also has experience writing entertainment news and celebrity-focused content.