50 Best Ghost Jokes to Get the Crew Howling on Halloween Night
Kids and adults will appreciate these funny quips and one-liners.
You don’t have to be a dad to tell a dad joke — and Halloween is the perfect time to break out a corny quip or two. These silly, punny and sometimes downright goofy ghost jokes are sure to get your crew laughing (or at least groaning while good-naturedly rolling their eyes). Scrawl a different G-rated ghost joke on a lunchbox note each day to get the kids giggling. Or pick one loaded with a bit more innuendo to tickle the funny bones of the adults in the crowd. Whatever you pick, and whomever the audience, these are the best ghost jokes in the game — and they’re guaranteed to raise their spirits this Halloween season. (See what we did there?) They also make great ice breakers for parties and pair perfectly with any games you're playing this year.
For more, be sure to check out our very best Halloween jokes, Halloween puns and funny Halloween Instagram caption ideas so you're all set once October 31 is here.
What did the ghost teacher say to the class?
Keep your eyes on the board while I go through it again.
Where do stylish ghosts go shopping?
Fancy boo-tiques.
What do you say when you catch a ghost?
I got you, boo!
How does a ghost unlock a door?
Using a spoo-key.
How did the ghost get from New York to London?
British Scare-ways.
What do ghosts eat with meatballs?
Spook-etti.
What’s a ghost’s favorite treat?
I scream.
Where do ghosts go trick or treating?
Dead ends.
How do ghosts wash their hair?
Sham-boo.
Why didn’t the ghost go to the prom?
He had no body to go with.
Why don’t ghosts convince anyone when they’re lying?
Because everyone can see right through them.
What do you call a ghost in the fireplace?
A toasty ghosty.
Why do ghosts ride elevators?
It raises their spirits.
How did the ghost make her eyes pop?
Ma-scare-a.
How does a ghost cry when he’s sad?
Boo! Hoo.
Why was the ghost kid embarrassed?
He had a boo-ger.
What places are on the ghost family’s beach-vacation shortlist?
Boo-dapest, the Boo-hamas, and Mali-boo.
Why do ghosts diet?
So they can maintain their ghoulish figures.
Why does a ghost hate getting caught in the rain?
It dampens her spirits.
What old-fashioned advice do ghosts give their kids?
Only spook when spoken to.
Alesandra is a digital travel and lifestyle journalist based in Los Angeles whose work has appeared in Good Housekeeping, Woman’s Day, Prevention, Insider, Glamour, Shondaland, AFAR, Parents, TODAY and countless other online and print outlets. Alesandra has a masters degree in journalism with an emphasis on cultural reporting and criticism from NYU, and a bachelor’s degree from UC Berkeley. An avid traveler, she trots the globe with her husband and their twins.
The Best of Amazon's Halloween Decorations
Win All the Awards With These Pop Culture Costumes
Creative Halloween Costume Ideas for Kids
80 Unique Group Halloween Costume Ideas
